How to Control Your Body Language When Triggered at Work

Only a fraction of what we communicate comes through the words we speak. Our facial expressions, posture, and tone of voice all play a role. We also communicate emotionally and energetically. If two people sit together in a room, an EKG can measure how the electronic energy of one person’s heart affects the other.

If you can become aware of the fact that your body sends messages of its own, you’ll gain insight into the response of others toward you. You can also gain control of the messages you send.

Here’s how that might look: Say your boss says something annoying to you in passing. Instantly, your sympathetic nervous system is aroused, your heart rate increases, your respiration rate shoots up, and the stress hormone cortisol is released into your bloodstream.

If you don’t pause and attend to your physical response, you may not be able to control your verbal response — and you may say something you regret.

If you don’t pause and attend to your physical response, you may not be able to control your verbal response — and you may say something you regret. But if you stop the moment you notice you’re upset, and conduct a mental review of your body sensations, you’ll have the chance to take a breath and relax. Relaxing under pressure allows for new responses and possibilities, so you can choose the best verbal reply and course of action.

Exercise: Body Check

The next time you feel annoyed at work, pause and conduct a brief mental body scan. Take the time to unclench your hands, relax your jaw, catch your breath, and step back a couple of feet (literally), rather than sending an inappropriate physical — or verbal — response.

Stealth Meditation

When walking to a meeting or to lunch, feel your feet against the ground and the sense of your body moving through space. Do not text or take calls while doing this.